Saturday, August 26, 2006

Flip This House!

I was just watching Flip This House - a TV show on TLC. People buy houses that need massive renovations and then turn around and sell them for $100,000-150,000 more than they paid (give or take). So, I was just watching this one house makeover. They paid like $550,000 for this small shithole (I don't know what city it was in... i only caught the end) and they went ahead and listed it for $749,000. This house was like 2000 feet, with a tiny yard, and really nothing special.

I'm thinking, "$749,000 is a lot of money. I wonder what I could buy in Rochester for $749,000?"

Well, here's an example. This house is listed at $750,000:





It is 7000 square feet on over 4 acres of land. 4 bedrooms, 4 full baths. 3.5 car garage. This is a fucking mansion. Or, I can buy a tiny shithole for $550,000, OR EVEN BETTER buy a FORMER total shit hole for $749,000. OK - I appreciate wanting to live in nifty areas, but give me a break. Give me the mansion over the shithole EVERY TIME.

Just for shits and giggles, here's another example. It's in Webster, right on the water. 3600 square feet. 4 bedrooms, 3.5 baths, 3 car garage, and brand spanking new:





Again, PLEASE let me buy a $750,000 mansion here in town than a tiny, 2000 (or smaller) square foot piece of SHIT. Literally, we're talking SHIT here. I don't fucking care if it's god damn downtown Las Vegas. I don't care if it's some fake-ass Laguna Beach "paradise". Other major metros who suck their own dicks cause they're soooooooo cool? Fuck you.

2 comments:

Dan said...

What about that crazy Ewok mushroom house out in Eastview mall? Now that'd be worth it.

Anonymous said...

Dude, its fucking hilarious that you wrote this article....I was JUST watching that show the other day and basically saying the same thing to Lynn....